Script    Courtship    Letters     Courtship    Letters    

Assimilation Anxiety

نگرانى يا دلواپسى از جذب شدن يا همگونى ساخته شدن

AboutCreativityMythology
by Rezwan on 12/12 at 05:57 PM
Printer FriendlyTell-a-Friend• (0) Comments



This site was founded by an Iranian+American who suffers, as many Iranian+Americans do, from Assimilation Anxiety.  Luckily, the cure is easy!


Accident of Birth

Does the soul have a nationality, a race, a denomination? Assuming that it does not, why does it get so wrapped up in cultural identity when it gets anchored into a body? Shouldn’t we all just try to rise above these petty things? Isn’t it ultimately racist and jingoistic to obssess over cultural identity? It certainly can be. Then again, a culture/nation/race/demonination provides a handy group of similar people around which to organize. Perhaps my non-defined soul is simply (and practically, sensibly even) leveraging the identity of my specific ethno-dimensional body for greater universal/spiritual transcendence (not to mention “for fun and profit"). Or so it should be. Yes, the operating system of the soul can operate on any body it happens to be installed on, whatever the race or country of origin. This one happens to be installed in an Iranian+American.

Iranian+American

I know. You’re thinking, “Isn’t that supposed to be Iranian hyphen American?” Well, yes. Conventionally.

In punctuation, a hyphen indicates that two words are joined together, connected. However, we find that the hyphen, which is also the symbol for subtraction or the negative in math, carries with it a not-so-subtle judgment about the nature of connection.

With the hyphen, you get the feeling that somehow, even though there are two things joined together, the whole is made up of only a part of each. In other words, it’s not that half of you is full Iranian and half is full American. It’s more like you are an improbable whole made up of half of an Iranian and half of an American. Like some kind of Frankenstien monster sewn together from parts found in the global morgue. Each component of your identity has been tainted by, and therefore reduced, corrupted and lessened by, the other.

This is very sad.

In contrast, with the new, improved plus symbol, you become twice the person! You no longer have a compromised, congealed, awkward, subtractive identity. Instead, you have expanded to have twice the identity. Trade your hyphen in for a plus symbol and unleash quantum physics to your advantage. Say it loud, and say it proud:

I am Iranian.
I am American.
It’s a particle.
It’s a wave. 


« Next Article
Portmanteau words
    Previous Article »
Semi-Cursive Script


Comments نظريات در مورد اين مطلب
There are no comments.

Post a Comment نظريات خود را ارائه فرمائید
Log In to comment.
Not a member? Register.
*لاگ اين* كنيد
یا خود را ثبت كنيد

Notify me of follow-up comments?



Immigrant Counter-Assimilation Experience

Note: This assimilation thing has multi-lateral anxiety to go all around, if the Thanksgiving story is any indication.

Symptoms of Assimilation Anxiety:

  1. Defensiveness
  2. Getting defensive when people say “Persian" instead of “Farsi” or “Eye-ran” instead of “Ear-on”
  3. Sweaty palms
  4. Anxiety about identity
  5. Sense of rejection
  6. Sense of being “less than”
  7. Awkwardness
  8. Judgmentalism
  9. Distancing
  10. Eczema

Treatment and Relief of Assimilation Anxiety:

  1. Relax
  2. Transcend
  3. Trade your hyphen in for a plus sign
  4. Wallow in the joy of multi-culturalism
  5. Wallow in the fun of bilingualism with Magnets!
  6. Get more involved in all your various communities, the dominant and the threatened ones both
  7. Take a moment to get clear on what you want to amplify from each group that you allegedly belong to. Then leverage these identities for a greater universal good.
  8. Get Simorq-anized.